moving

Ah, fall. A season of change and transition. More than summer or winter, fall (and spring) really have a transitory feel to them. The leaves change and eventually fall from the trees. The weather gets gradually colder (or as has been the case here in Chicago, just sort of goes up and down but mostly gets colder) and eventually the snow will start to fall, ushering in winter. And for us, it will bring other transitions. We have made the difficult decision to leave Chicago. We will be moving to Rockford (South Beloit, to be more exact) where we will stay with Dan's parents for the next month or so. This will be a time of gathering our wits, reorganizing our stuff, and saving money while continuing the job search/waiting process. We don't know exactly what will happen at the end of one or two months, but we are hoping for the best. As much as it will be hard for us to leave the city we love and people we love, we think this will be for the best. It has been very difficult to feel like our life is scattered all over the place with some stuff in one place, some in another, mail going to multiple addresses and all of this coupled with an uncertain future. Yesterday, a friend compared this move to punting which I feel is a very apt analogy. Not what you really want to do, but it is better than doing nothing. The game must go on. Just like life.

We won't be that far away and for those of you in Chicago, we are certainly up for coming back into the city to hang out. Who knows, maybe we will even come back. We'll see what happens. In the meantime, however, we will continue to wait and hope and trust God.

new

Yes, for those of you who were unsure, we are still in Chicago. We're currently living up in Roger's Park in a lovely little studio apartment that we are subleasing until the end of October. After that, well, that still remains to be seen. It has been a crazy busy summer and it feels like fall has just snuck up on us. I mean, I like fall and everything but it came awfully quickly this year. Dan worked like a maniac all summer (for which I am exceedingly grateful) and I worked as well, though not quite as much. Now I'm back to subbing, which seemed like a great idea when I decided to do it but I'm realizing I should have stayed at my old job for a few more weeks to give CPS a chance to actually get rolling so teachers could take days off and need me to take their places. Oh well...I guess you live and learn. And I have indeed learned from it.

This whole summer seems to have been a time of learning for us. Dan has learned to embrace the title of "pastor" and I've learned that I want to be a librarian. So that's what we are pursuing. And even though it has been a very long time of waiting, it hasn't been completely awful. It's been fun to get to know new parts of the city and to experience living in Chicago away from North Park. And of course, someday when we have kids, we'll be able to tell them all about our days as nomads when we are convincing them they have nothing to complain about.

And that is pretty much where we are. I'm going to try to make an effort to post more often so this blog does not go the way of our xanga and myspace sites. here's hoping!

tea for two...

Nearly two months after our last post, it seems like a good time to update again. In some ways, life has changed a lot since May. In other ways, it's pretty much the same. We are still living in Chicago but at a new location. We have been amazingly blessed by people willing to open up their homes to us as we sit at this particular juncture. That's a great thing. We are also both working, which is also great. Dan loves working at CRiCK again this summer and my job as a CNA has been going well enough.

Life is right now. It feels like we have been at a crossroads for some time now without much definite direction. It will come in time but it is increasingly difficult to continue to be patient. I think the hardest part of all of this is the lack of a definite time line. We have a tentative one planned out, but we can't hold too tightly to it because God has this funny way of changing our plans to something better.

As I look back at this post, I realize that it sounds fairly cryptic. I personally find it difficult to be concrete when so much is unknown. I told someone today that life is "okay". I think that is a good way to describe it. It is certainly not horrible but it is not the best it could be. It is okay. And that is okay for now.

recent photos

Maybe a month ago we went for a day hike to Starved Rock State Park. It was an overcast day, but some sun shone through at intermittent times. It was a great day to shoot in black and white.
Annie took the opportunity to practice her photo taking abilities. Here are some of her shots.

While it was a pretty muddy hike, we managed to stay relatively clean and mud-free. That is until the last 5 minutes of the hike when one misstep made a big difference.

All in all we had a great day at a great park. It was good for us to get some time away and have time to reflect on life and discern where we are headed next. We still do not have any details on that part and definitely post when we do.

update, finally!

wow! It's been a bit since either one of us has posted anything. some of that is due to the site being blocked by my (annie's) workplace's filter. Not sure why I can access it now, but I'm not going to argue. It might be like that period of time when I could get to facebook from work--sometimes, around one o'clock, if I was lucky. anyway, as long as I'm here, I might as use the time wisely. [I work at a school, for those of you who don't know, which is why things like facebook are blocked]

So there isn't much new going on. We're still in Chicago, living with wonderful people who were gracious enough to let us stay with them. We're following roads as they are brought to our attention but nothing has led us far enough to settle in any place yet. It's okay. It's been a time of waiting. Of learning. We know God has a place for us and that when we get there, it will be fantastic. It's simply hard to wait for it sometimes.

I am still working in Gurnee, I finished my nursing assistant class at the end of February and will be taking the state certification test in May. It was supposed to be April but there were some miscommunications and I got bumped. It is what it is, I suppose.

Otherwise, we live and enjoy each day as it comes.

two trains of thought, each with its own track

It has been difficult for me (Dan) to interact with this blog for some time now. Last night I realized, at least partially, why. I have finished seminary classes, and while that should be an exciting fact I find myself not so because I am waiting for a call into ministry. I do not want to bore others with my worries or doubts or fears, so I am waiting to update until a time when I have "good news". Well, it has dawned on me that it is also good news to be able to express the not so good news as well. Instead of hiding in a bunker-like mentality, waiting for the potential bombs to be dropped on my head I can actually get out and move. I am trying this mentality. While not easy, I feel it will prove beneficial.

I (still Dan) have been reflecting a lot lately. As previously mentioned, or alluded to, I have some time. Specifically, my mind has settled on friendship. More specifically, I have been mourning the loss of past friendships. It seems that it is a rare thing to possess other human beings in your life that (a) intricately know who you are at a deep level, (b) encourage you to live into who you are, and (c) have spent enough time in your life that, if they decided to become utterly evil they could destroy every fiber of your being in 10 seconds or less. From the best I can tell, I have two of those friends in my life right now. There may be others who become those types of friends, only time will tell. We havent spent that much life together yet. It's simple logic really. But, I have also lost, at least (and probably only) one such friend. This is a frustrating thing. It makes me wish that I understood the importance of other people in your life at an earlier date in my life. Of course we can all say that. It is that same cliche of 20/20 hindsight and whatnot.

too busy being fabulous

once upon a time, there was a nice couple who had a blog. And occasionally, they updated this blog. Not as often as they probably should have (assuming, of course, that people read this), but occasionally. And today is one of those days.

Much has happened since the last time we posted anything. I know I promised pictures but those will have to wait since I (annie) am at work and do not have access to any. AT least as far as I know. I'll do a little research.

here are the top 5 things since the last time we updated:



1. Dan finished seminary!!! He officially has a Masters in Christian Formation and we are now looking for a call. I'm so proud of him!

2. Christmas. It was the first time that all of my family and their respective significant others (4 out of 5 my siblings have an "other") were together for the holiday. It was great to be able to see everyone and especially to spend time with Adam who will be deployed to either Iraq or Afghanistan next month. We also got to see Dan's family before and after Christmas, which was a nice change of pace from my parents super-crowded house. Things are much more laid back and low-key and it's a great place to relax a bit. (the hot tub also helps with that) :)

3. Dan turned 29!

4. As previously mentioned, we're looking for the next thing. I'm not going to go into much detail since we don't even have that many details ourselves, but things are sort of churning and we hope to know sooner, rather than later.

5. I think New Years is the other bigger thing. It was fun. We got to see friends from out of town, meet new people and stay up late. What more could you want??

And that is our life lately in a nutshell. Not super detailed, but it's something. And like I said, I'll do a little research to see about pictures. I might be back later today.

The weekend

Back to work and classes today. The first surprise of the day came when I (annie) got up and discovered that on the day I overslept by half an hour, it would be necessary for me to leave at least 15 minutes earlier for work. Hooray for snow! I really do love it though. What a great way to usher in December.

This past weekend was wonderful! We had a relaxing day on Thursday with our neighbors and Steve. (Pictures to follow) It was great to share ovens and cooking and conversation, as well as a delicious meal. We were really blessed. And even though Dan had to do work and I had to do errands like taking care of car stuff and grocery shopping, it was wonderful weekend! We slept in, exercised, decorated the house for Christmas and watched football. I really felt relaxed and loved the time we got to spend with each other. And now I feel ready to work 3 more weeks before Christmas....let's hope that stays with me!

what the world needs now

So maybe we should work on posting more than once a month but maybe it's okay that it has been awhile. Anyway. Life has been full. I think I'm going to start trying to move away from using the word busy because it feels like it leaves very little room for adjustment in life. We are continuing to look for jobs and for where we will settle for the next 3-5 years. It's tempting to try to think longer term, like the next 10 or 20 years but that only makes things more complicated. So we are trying to focus on the not-quite-so-distant future. It is a hard road on which to keep moving. It's easy to get stuck in the mire of doubts, questions, and unsureness or to be waylaid by life as it is right now.

We have, however, had time to experience some wonderful things. Dan and I went to see Over the Rhine and Martin Sexton in the same week. Both were wonderful! I had never heard Over the Rhine so it was all new to me but I really enjoyed myself. Something about their music touched me deeply--it was almost like a healing for my heart. Martin Sexton I had heard before but I really wasn't that much a fan of his music--at least until I heard him in person on Friday. That was amazing! It is crazy that he is so talented! Of course, it probably helped that we were approximately 5 people-rows (we stood) back from the stage. What an experience!

Otherwise, we live. We go to work, classes, do homework, and spend time with people (as much as we can). Life is not bad. Just unsure.

take on me, take me on...

I (Dan) feel like I am living in a constant state of examen. It is good, I suppose, but that is just what we are supposed to say. In all honesty, I am in pain. I am remembering my pain and delving deep into what it means and where it comes from, which is good in the end. It is just that there is no resolve at the moment. No point where all is made known in that proverbial “ah-ha” moment. This week’s journaling exercises flowed from me freely in ways that previous week’s did not. This is mostly because I feel on the verge. Life beckons and the protection that this place has offered is coming to a close. Vulnerability and anxiety are driving up the lane, preparing for their visit. I do not want to be hospitable.

I think the take away from this week is that I was able, through putting fears to paper, to claim God’s promises more. I was able to shout my wants and desires to God. I was able to ask for God’s help, for clarity and a sense of purpose. While each day I feel rudderless in this sea of life, peace and direction are on their way. My hope is that when all the aforementioned visitors arrive for the party, that peace and direction have a prominent role as guests of honor.

can it be true?

Sports Illustrated's Gary Smith, a longtime writer for the mag and known for his ability to effectively chronicle the life and times in the United States of America, recently spent some time in Chicago and with the Chicago Cubs. The Tribune interviewed him. As a life-long fan of the Cubs, I (Dan) was interested to hear what this man had to say.

Here is a exerpt:

"To me, life is all about living it with full passion and zest and with arms wide open. At the same time, understand on one level the meaningless of it, and on the other level, living like it means everything. In a way, that's what sports is all about. Cub fans, to me, have grasped that more than most fan bases. They are totally into it and have invested so much of themselves into it. But they also understand on some level the absurdity of it all. There's a sweet metaphor about life there and how you approach life, and if you could live with the contradiction, live with the paradox."

I like it. Go Cubs.

you say potato, i say you're right

its official, the chicago nighttime skyline is just pretty.

 

being for the benefit of mr. kite

Just a brief update on our life. We've now been back in Chicago for a little over a month and at school and work for a month. It's fall now (hooray!) officially, even though the weather does not give a good testament to that fact. Work has been pretty good for me (anne), though busier than I would like. (I'm a building sub at a high school--for those of you who don't know) I think 4 or 5 classes each day is a great number. Lately I've been doing 7 (with one period for lunch). It kind of helps the day go faster but I would prefer a little more downtime. Oh well. Lots of variety though. I think I've been in every department in the building at least once--except technology and industrial arts--since I've been back this year. Always lovely.

Classes are going well for Dan. He is getting settled into more of a routine with classes, homework, and work and likes what he is learning. He's also been working quite a bit at Chicago River Canoe and Kayak on the weekends, which he has really enjoyed.

Of course, not all weekends have been working weekends. Two weekends ago, we headed up to the Twin Cities because my sister Laura was getting married. A weekend full of festivities, fun, putzy little details and time spent with family and friends ensued. The ceremony was really nice and emotional, albeit a bit too long for my taste. This was probably exacerbated by the fact that I was standing up front, trying not to lock my knees, get dizzy, or fidget too much. We also got to take a detour on the way back through Ripon, WI to drop my other sister, Sharon, back off at college. (she attends Ripon College) It was a fun drive, very pretty and it was neat to see her dorm room and campus.

Otherwise, not much eventful going on. We made it for the Wendella boat tour last weekend...always a good time. Some lovely friends are staying with us the second half of the week and we're hoping to go apple picking on Saturday. Pie, anyone?

Life's been pretty good. We still want to know what is next for us but that will come. And so will pictures of recent events as soon as I'm not at work, or Dan has time to post some. Oh the anticipation!

pennies, high school musical, and the right stuff

so it seems like i'm never quite in the right place at the right time. the other day, my sister and I were at the Mall of America, doing some wedding shoe shopping (no, not for me...in case you were unaware, that's already been taken care of. They were shoes for her.) and we happened upon a large crowd of screaming young teens, surrounding what appeared to be a giant yellow box. This caught our interest so we stopped to see what the fuss was all about. It turns out that Office Depot was doing some sort of promotion/event that had to do with two million pennies (apparently contained in the giant yellow box). This didn't seem all that exciting so we weren't sure what everyone was so jazzed about. As it happens, they weren't excited about pennies, they were excited about Vanessa Hudgens who was there to unveil the box and then sign autographs. That we saw.

What we (I) didn't see was a New Kids on the Block performance. I finished work at 4 and on my way out, saw a stage and what appeared to be all the trappings of a performance soon to be happening. So I waited for awhile, thinking it would be cool if it happened around 4:30 or so (the crowds seemed to indicate that it would be sooner, rather than later). However, I soon found out that they weren't going to appear until 5:30 and decided that I just couldn't wait that long. So I went home.

I guess it could be argued that missing the second happening was my own fault, since I chose to leave but I will say that I would much rather have stumbled upon NKOTB than Vanessa Hudgens (no offense to those of you who are rabid fans...).

However, it was the first time I saw a famous person at the Mall of America so it seems that my working there for the past month or so has become worth it after all.

or something like that...

Deer tick? Salt lick? Catholic!

Today was just like any other day as I strolled through the halls of St. Gertrude's Hospital. I was on my way to a patient’s room because she had requested chaplain visits. This is a common activity for me, nothing out of the ordinary yet. As I enter the room and start to speak to the women, all changes. I introduced myself, stating that I am chaplain and that I understood that she has requested visits, which she did. Her first words are, “Are you Catholic?” I respond by stating that I was raised Catholic and that I am a part of the staff here at the hospital that is available for patient needs. She then informs me that she is Catholic, in a tone that ushers forth the following phrase of “and if you ain’t a priest then you ain’t a visitin’ me sonny”. Looking back, I could have actually answered differently.

#1 I was tempted to say that yes I was Catholic. After all, I was raised, baptized, and confirmed in the Catholic faith. I feel that, while there are some areas I don’t fully comply with Catholicism I am far from hostile towards it.

#2 I could have said that I was catholic, meaning in my own understanding that which is universal or ecumenical. But this is not what the women meant by the term and that would have been dishonest and I shied away from that option.

It is fun to note my process in that brief moment. As I was speaking I was wondering if I should just go ahead and say yes to her inquisition. What did it matter if she thought one thing about me? I would be able to speak with her and perhaps even offer counsel. This would run the risk of me being trapped in some sort of theological quandary as I would most likely answer some questions without the foreknowledge of where the Roman Catholic Church stood.

In all I didn’t answer these other ways because I needed to be honest, with her and myself. While I still feel a connection with my Catholic roots, this one set of religious convictions do not fully represent me. I am glad that I was honest, but also hurt that I wasn’t deemed good enough because I wasn’t Catholic. On one level I get it. There is some type of divide between Catholics and Protestants, they are bitter rivals, animosity, blah, blah, blah. I think it can also be seen that I don’t really get it either.

In the end, I did what I could. Well, it is better said that I am happy with what I did. I feel sad that the women felt that I was unfit because I was not Catholic, but what can I do really? I guess if I ain’t a priest then I ain’t a visitin her.

Promised pictures.

At long last, success! The stars are aligned and the blogging gods must be on my side. Fabulous! And now, in no particular order, some pictures from our summer so far.

We headed up to Duluth with our friends, Tim and Heidi (and baby Justin) for the 4th of July weekend. It has a lovely boardwalk/path along the shore of Lake Superior so we took a walk.

And at the Rose Garden, there is nothing like stopping to smell them!

Beautiful flowers, beautiful picture. This is in Duluth as well.

And Gooseberry Falls (farther up along the North Shore). I believe these are the middle falls but I'm not entirely sure.

Here we are, at the upper falls.

My little sister graduated from high school this year and we were able to make it back to Wausau for her party. While there, an unxepected thing happened. We discovered that a Cornish Pixie had made himself at home in her cake...

Minnehaha Falls.

This is Tim and Heidi's baby, Justin. He and I hung out a bit while in Duluth.

Finally, my sister Sharon and my grandma. Aren't they cute?

And that, my friends, is some of what we've been doing. There are more pictures in existance but I am unable to locate the cord I need in order to move them from the camera to the computer so they will have to wait.

"the time has come," the walrus said...

So after multiple false starts, the time has finally come to post something new. This summer seems like it is going extremely fast (it's already half way through july!) but very slowly at the same time. We are indeed in Minnesota and overall, it has been an interesting experience. I JUST found some kind of steady work after numerous disappointments and learning about myself and how I (anne) tend to sabotage myself sometimes. We're glad this opportunity came up because it allows me to stay here for the rest of the summer. The other thing we had been discussing was sending me back to Chicago to just look for full time work there. Which I still need for the fall so if anyone has any leads on anything, please let me know. Dan has been learning a lot through CPE, which is great. It has been tough with several calls during his "on-call" times, but overall a learning experience. It still leaves much uncertainty about our future but we're really hoping things come together more this coming semester.

Our time here hasn't been all worry and learning though...we have managed to get out and explore a little.

Okay...I'll try pictures again another day. I don't know why it's not working for me but I just can't get any of them to be posted. *sigh* Coming soon...I promise.

What we've been up to

Well, it has been more than a month since we last posted and many things have happened since then. The seminary school year is finished so Dan finally has time to relax before CPE starts in a week and a half. I only have 3 days left so it's almost time for me to have my own break before summer work starts. The next major thing to do is packing for the summer...yes, that's right, we're packing up and leaving town for the summer. We will be in sunny Minneapolis, MN while does his CPE. We're looking forward to a change of scenery, time with friends, and the chance to see if chaplaincy is right for Dan. Oh, and I'll be working wherever will hire me. I have an interview with Dunwoody College of Technology right after we get to the Cities for a summer camp program...we're really hoping that it works out. The search for employment in the fall for Anne continues...there have been a few steps in the right direction but nothing definite. Otherwise, life has been pretty good. It's nice to finally be in a pace of life that is a little slower than it was all semester. It makes things a little easier and we like it.

the pandas are coming

life continues to keep us busy. I successfully completed the Shamrock Shuffle on March 30th in 51:59. (Better than any of my training times!). Pictures will be posted soon. I am in the second week of a new job as a building substitute up in Gurnee. This means that I work set hours (8-4), show up each morning not knowing exactly what I will be doing for the day, and often find myself with extra time during the day. (and by extra time, I mostly mean time when we might be working on data entry with no particular time we need to be finished by or on a project where we can watch a movie or something while we work on it). There are 4 other people who do the same job as me and we share a tiny little office. It's not a bad job...just very different from what I was doing before. Dan is still in school and now we are spending more of our [limited] time together talking about what our future will look like post-seminary. It's actually pretty exciting to have so many possibilities in front of us. Our summer in Minnesota is also coming up. We are looking forward to the time we will have around friends we don't see very often and the chance for Dan to learn more about what the future holds through the CPE program. And finally, we're heading up to Carthage on Saturday to see Counting Crows. Woohoo! It should be a good time. :)

Update

Well, Dan is out of town this week which means that I have an abundance of "me time." I think it will be okay...probably even good for me. He is the trip advisor for a university ministries trip to Appalachia so he is off having fun in the mountains. ah yes, my very own mountain man. :) life has been a bit crazy for us lately. Dan is so busy with classes and u-min and I struggle with the fact that work just drains me every day. I'm not sure if that's just part of teaching or if it is my particular situation (not teaching history and in chicago public schools) that makes every day so difficult. I really am looking forward to my official spring break (next week). I'm also glad that I can use this week to work through some of what I've been learning before Dan comes back. That means more of my energy can be used to focus on us. I'm excited for that.

In other news, we're going to be in Minnesota this summer while Dan does his CPE rotation in Shakopee so if anyone knows of a place we can stay or has a job for me while I'm there, we would love to get all that in place as soon as we can. But, I should probably get back to doing lesson plans for next week. *fist pump* yes!