no man's land

Sometimes, well probably always, it is strange to be in a place of transition and waiting. There is so much going on while nothing seems to be happening. I (annie) have started my CNA (certified nursing assistant) class and am in the process of changing over my career from teaching to nursing. Thus far, I have learned that it will be a huge lesson in empathy, in addition to all the skills and knowledge related to the practical aspects of the job. A good lesson to learn, but not always easy. I also spent a good portion of my day today sharpening pencils and grouping them in 10s (I averaged about 200 an hour). Always a good reminder why I went to college. :)

It's like we're in a sort of no-mans land. My drive to work yesterday struck me as a good metaphor for our current state. I was headed north on 94 and to the west of me was the nearly full moon. To the east you could see the sunlight beginning to peak over the horizon. It was getting lighter but the sun was not yet officially up. Day was beginning but night was not yet finished. That's how I feel right now. There are opportunities peaking over the horizon but we don't know much about them except that they exist. And there is nothing we can do to make them come faster but we are confident that something will pop over that horizon. The moon is the reminder that we aren't out of the unknown yet. It's a reminder of the darkness of not knowing.

It seemed apt and helped me to get a better handle on where we are. Waiting, praying, hoping. it's not such a bad place to be.

two trains of thought, each with its own track

It has been difficult for me (Dan) to interact with this blog for some time now. Last night I realized, at least partially, why. I have finished seminary classes, and while that should be an exciting fact I find myself not so because I am waiting for a call into ministry. I do not want to bore others with my worries or doubts or fears, so I am waiting to update until a time when I have "good news". Well, it has dawned on me that it is also good news to be able to express the not so good news as well. Instead of hiding in a bunker-like mentality, waiting for the potential bombs to be dropped on my head I can actually get out and move. I am trying this mentality. While not easy, I feel it will prove beneficial.

I (still Dan) have been reflecting a lot lately. As previously mentioned, or alluded to, I have some time. Specifically, my mind has settled on friendship. More specifically, I have been mourning the loss of past friendships. It seems that it is a rare thing to possess other human beings in your life that (a) intricately know who you are at a deep level, (b) encourage you to live into who you are, and (c) have spent enough time in your life that, if they decided to become utterly evil they could destroy every fiber of your being in 10 seconds or less. From the best I can tell, I have two of those friends in my life right now. There may be others who become those types of friends, only time will tell. We havent spent that much life together yet. It's simple logic really. But, I have also lost, at least (and probably only) one such friend. This is a frustrating thing. It makes me wish that I understood the importance of other people in your life at an earlier date in my life. Of course we can all say that. It is that same cliche of 20/20 hindsight and whatnot.

too busy being fabulous

once upon a time, there was a nice couple who had a blog. And occasionally, they updated this blog. Not as often as they probably should have (assuming, of course, that people read this), but occasionally. And today is one of those days.

Much has happened since the last time we posted anything. I know I promised pictures but those will have to wait since I (annie) am at work and do not have access to any. AT least as far as I know. I'll do a little research.

here are the top 5 things since the last time we updated:



1. Dan finished seminary!!! He officially has a Masters in Christian Formation and we are now looking for a call. I'm so proud of him!

2. Christmas. It was the first time that all of my family and their respective significant others (4 out of 5 my siblings have an "other") were together for the holiday. It was great to be able to see everyone and especially to spend time with Adam who will be deployed to either Iraq or Afghanistan next month. We also got to see Dan's family before and after Christmas, which was a nice change of pace from my parents super-crowded house. Things are much more laid back and low-key and it's a great place to relax a bit. (the hot tub also helps with that) :)

3. Dan turned 29!

4. As previously mentioned, we're looking for the next thing. I'm not going to go into much detail since we don't even have that many details ourselves, but things are sort of churning and we hope to know sooner, rather than later.

5. I think New Years is the other bigger thing. It was fun. We got to see friends from out of town, meet new people and stay up late. What more could you want??

And that is our life lately in a nutshell. Not super detailed, but it's something. And like I said, I'll do a little research to see about pictures. I might be back later today.

The weekend

Back to work and classes today. The first surprise of the day came when I (annie) got up and discovered that on the day I overslept by half an hour, it would be necessary for me to leave at least 15 minutes earlier for work. Hooray for snow! I really do love it though. What a great way to usher in December.

This past weekend was wonderful! We had a relaxing day on Thursday with our neighbors and Steve. (Pictures to follow) It was great to share ovens and cooking and conversation, as well as a delicious meal. We were really blessed. And even though Dan had to do work and I had to do errands like taking care of car stuff and grocery shopping, it was wonderful weekend! We slept in, exercised, decorated the house for Christmas and watched football. I really felt relaxed and loved the time we got to spend with each other. And now I feel ready to work 3 more weeks before Christmas....let's hope that stays with me!

what the world needs now

So maybe we should work on posting more than once a month but maybe it's okay that it has been awhile. Anyway. Life has been full. I think I'm going to start trying to move away from using the word busy because it feels like it leaves very little room for adjustment in life. We are continuing to look for jobs and for where we will settle for the next 3-5 years. It's tempting to try to think longer term, like the next 10 or 20 years but that only makes things more complicated. So we are trying to focus on the not-quite-so-distant future. It is a hard road on which to keep moving. It's easy to get stuck in the mire of doubts, questions, and unsureness or to be waylaid by life as it is right now.

We have, however, had time to experience some wonderful things. Dan and I went to see Over the Rhine and Martin Sexton in the same week. Both were wonderful! I had never heard Over the Rhine so it was all new to me but I really enjoyed myself. Something about their music touched me deeply--it was almost like a healing for my heart. Martin Sexton I had heard before but I really wasn't that much a fan of his music--at least until I heard him in person on Friday. That was amazing! It is crazy that he is so talented! Of course, it probably helped that we were approximately 5 people-rows (we stood) back from the stage. What an experience!

Otherwise, we live. We go to work, classes, do homework, and spend time with people (as much as we can). Life is not bad. Just unsure.

take on me, take me on...

I (Dan) feel like I am living in a constant state of examen. It is good, I suppose, but that is just what we are supposed to say. In all honesty, I am in pain. I am remembering my pain and delving deep into what it means and where it comes from, which is good in the end. It is just that there is no resolve at the moment. No point where all is made known in that proverbial “ah-ha” moment. This week’s journaling exercises flowed from me freely in ways that previous week’s did not. This is mostly because I feel on the verge. Life beckons and the protection that this place has offered is coming to a close. Vulnerability and anxiety are driving up the lane, preparing for their visit. I do not want to be hospitable.

I think the take away from this week is that I was able, through putting fears to paper, to claim God’s promises more. I was able to shout my wants and desires to God. I was able to ask for God’s help, for clarity and a sense of purpose. While each day I feel rudderless in this sea of life, peace and direction are on their way. My hope is that when all the aforementioned visitors arrive for the party, that peace and direction have a prominent role as guests of honor.

recent shots

A nice night-time Wrigley Building view.



Fun while on Wendella Boat trip

Does something seem strange?